Let Me Suffer.

Those who work in prison ministry can surely understand the anguish of people caught in the iron grip of the justice system, and the anguish of their families. A beloved son convicted of a serious crime and condemned to life in a penal institution, or even worse, to death, leaves a parent hopelessly heartbroken. Watching the child he or she raised, and loved, and hoped for,and dreamed for, now destined to a life of suffering and shame, to a life of unreached potential and broken dreams. No wonder Our Lord included prison ministry as an act of mercy, "I was in prison and you visited me."( Mt. 25: 36.). He should know, for God has long suffered the anguish and the pain of a convict's parent.
Imagine the day of the Fall, long ago, God, who in His infinite kindness, had set His hopes on our first parents, had given them everything, and allowed them to live in His Presence. He kept them from death, "for God did not make death, nor does He rejoice in the death of the living." (Wisdom 1:13).  He gave them dominion over all creation, He gave them free will, it was a gamble for Him, but He knew that love demands freedom, and that the first ingredient of a successful relationship is mutual consent. He wanted them to consent to His love by the way they lived in obedience to His command. "If you love Me you will obey my commandments." (John 14:15).
Jesus said to His disciples, whoever has seen me has seen the Father also. John the evangelist writes what is perhaps the most beautiful verse in Scripture, and all literature, "Jesus began to weep." ( John 11:35). Imagine the God of the universe, the God who has no beginning nor end, and who is all powerful and omnipotent, weeping, If we see Jesus the Son, weeping, then we see also the Father weeping for us. This verse of the Gospel of John is a window into God's heart, tender and loving, and in pain. Who can read those beautiful texts in the books of the prophets Jeremiah and Hosea and not share in God's anguish and pain? Jeremiah prays to God saying, Lord because of Your forbearance do not take me away, (Jer 15:15). Some translations write, "Because of Your long-suffering"  And Hosea quotes God saying;  "My heart recoils within me , my compassion grows warm and tender.( Hosea 11:18). Here we have Scripture's own testimony that God has long suffered and that His heart recoils with pain and compassion. This is something that those who are close to God do not overlook. St. Padre Pio says that we must hide our tears from Him who shed tears for us and continues to shed them because of our ingratitude. And sharing His pain is the task of those who love Him. Like the Son and His Mother who suffered so much for the Father and for us all.
In the book of Genesis we see how God answers the question to His question to Cain, "Where is your brother Abel?" and Cain answers shamefully, " Am I my brother's keeper?" (Gen. 4:9). God answers Cain's question with silence He does not answer with words but with action, by sending His only Son to suffer and die for our sins.
This is how God gives suffering a redemptive meaning, united with the suffering of His Son, our suffering is not just meaningless pain that destroys man's spirit, but a gift that ennobles and glorifies him because he is sharing in the loving mission of God.
In our vocation as Secular Carmelites we share in the mission of the Order which St. Therese so beautifully expresses in her book "The Story of a Soul."  "I stated what I had come to do in Carmel, I have come to save souls, and most of all to pray for priests." In other words I have come to share Your anguish Lord, I have come to share Your pain. To suffer with You and  for the sake of my brothers. It is a great mission.  Our Holy Mother Teresa of Jesus wrote in her "Interior Castle." That it is a great alms to pray for those who are in mortal sin.
Great is that day in our spiritual life, when we can say with joy, Good God, let me suffer with You. It is not necessarily to ask for suffering but to accept joyfully whatever comes. It is our prison ministry.

LET ME SUFFER.

Let me suffer in silence my God,

for You and for the sake of my brother.

For in anguish and pain

since the day of the Fall long ago,

You bear in Your Heart our disdain.

Let me suffer in silence my God,

with You on the cross.

You gambled with us,

You gave us free will, and You lost.

But You gather jewels of love

from the dust.

Let me carry Your cross,

as also I must.

Let me suffer in silence with You.

That not One be forbearing, but two

Let me share in Your hurt,

all my days on this earth.

Till the day You have planned,

till we all understand,

You are Love.